Dayton's Blog: A pimple on the ass of the Internet.

Forwarded by a friend:

Scott Frank Tells CHUD, "I'm not remaking Conquest of the Planet of the Apes!"

Let's see...

1) The plot revolves around an intelligent ape named Caesar.

2) Caesar leads an ape rebellion against humans.

Yes, I know, he's changing some of the details, and it's possible that this version may well surpass the original in terms of quality, but come on...let's call a spade a spade, shall we? You're remaking the movie. No, you really are. The story you're crafting has its roots in another story, which the studio already made once. Further, the story we're talking about was itself the third sequel to a movie originally based on a book. The only reason this new project had any chance of being greenlit is because of its association with Planet of the Apes, a property Fox has been looking to restart for years. Otherwise, I would've expected at least one studio exec with a functioning brain cell to look at this pitch and say, "Aren't you just remaking one of those Planet of the Apes movies?"

Well, you think that's what would happen.

One of the many reasons I loathe Hollywood -- when they're not just outright repeating themselves with the same old crap -- is their penchant for taking other people's work, putting some kind of spin on it, and then claiming it as an original work they created from whole cloth. One recent, blatant example was last year's cinematic turd The Invasion, which studio execs had the audacity to claim was not another take on Jack Finney's classic The Body Snatchers. That the movie sucked donkey balls was karmic justice, so far as I was concerned.

I'm not saying this is what's occurring here, as evidenced by Frank's own comments. For all I know, the guy just wants to avoid being painted with the remake/reimagining/re-whatever brush that everybody's getting hit with these days. I can understand that, even though I'm not against remakes on general principle. Some of my favorite movies of the past 10-20 years have been remakes. The Fugitive, Ocean's Eleven to name two off the top of my head. In those cases, the filmmakers acknowledged they were crafting a remake. Looking ahead to the forthcoming remake of The Day the Earth Stood Still, the creators are acknowledging the film's roots -- both to the 1951 film as well as Harry Bates' original story "Farewell to the Master" -- even though the story has understandably been updated to reflect modern concerns and social issues. Last year's I Am Legend paid similar homage and respect, regardless of what you might think of the finished product. "Remake" in and of itself is not a dirty word; it's the execution that counts. The reason so many people are down on remakes these days is that so very many of them have been truly, inarguably awful.

But hey, as an unabashed Apes fan, I'm pulling for this project to succeed. I just want credit given where it's due, is all.